Any foreigner who spends time in an Isaan village will eventually be invited to a party. The locals use almost any excuse to party, the most common being weddings, funerals, New Year, house blessings, son joining the army and son-becoming-a-monk-for-a-few-days. They all follow the same pattern except funeral parties at which the music is more sombre and the dancing girls are absent.
Most occasions require the presence of monks for chanting, eating and ritual. The party itself takes place either the evening before or after the monks have done their bit.
Invitations are handed out in envelopes bearing the invitees' names and returned to the host with gifts of cash sealed inside. The amount and name of the donor is recorded in a book as a reminder as to how much to give when a donor holds a party.
Food is essential, of course. Typical Isaan village food doesn't appeal to me so I eat before I go and nibble dutifully at anything that's looks acceptable. The locals will eat their fill. The best food is known as 'Chinese Table' - much more appealing to me and offered at parties where the host wants to show that his or her wealth is a bit above the average.
Another essential is alcohol. Many Thai women don't indulge and I'm often wary of those who do. The men make up for what the women don't drink. Usually, the offering is beer and the rice spirit know as Lao Khao or 40 Degree. The latter is very potent and, judging by the appearance of its most ardent fans, not good for the health. Whisky was also common on party tables a few years ago but less so these days.
Funeral parties apart, no event is complete without a stage full of singers and young girl dancers. When I first saw one of these non-stop spectacles I was enthralled. Eventually, though, they begin to look a little sad. The girls begin their show wearing full costume and performing slow, sedate gyrations. By the half way point, they are down to small tops and short skirts and doing energetic hip thrusts. Several of the girls on stage will barely know the routines and look disinterested. To earn a few Baht, they are supposed to tease the drunken young men who display their own dancing skills in front of the stage and the older drunks who lear at them from their tables. If you are lucky, you will get a comedian thrown in but, unless you speak Thai or Isaan, you won't know what everyone is laughing at.
At some point, the MC or comedian will spot you and call 'Farang' over the microphone. He wants you on stage to make a fool of yourself singing or dancing. Sit near the back and don't get up!
Many families fill themselves with food and leave as soon as the plates are empty. We try to be more polite than that but, eventually, boredom and alcohol reach their limit and we have chatted with all of our family and friends present and we leave with the usual thank you's and wais. As we leave, we make a point of sharing a joke or two with the local police who seem to be paid to sit with the guests. In a small community you should make an effort to get to know those officers in your family and others who will see you out and about. You never know when you might want their help.
By all means experience these parties from time to time. In fact, it's expected that at least your Thai partner will attend. I avoid all of the early morning sessions (parties can restart at 5.00am with recorded music) because the local men delight in trying to ply farang with Lao Khao.

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